Today was the annual trip to the cookie doctor (yay vulva!) and a new assistant nurse did the before-hand things: checked my blood pressure (116 over 85) and my weight (these were the few moments when i didn’t like her much), etc. Afterward she gave me the ugly buttless smock everyone just loooooves to put on (I asked Ralph if guys had to do this, too, when they see the gyno).
She told me to take off everything when I put it on, but that I can keep my socks on, if I wanted. I told her that, no, I would feel silly. She said that 95% of the patients do leave their socks on and this is when I turned into Philosophe mayo.
Why do 95% of the patients do, do you suppose? The rooms are kept fairly toasty and stirrups have these little booties to keep you safe from the cold metal. Is it a security thing? Two small footsie vambraces to show that you’re not scared? To keep you safe? To keep your dignity in tact? To hide something? I choose to face it all sockless. If I’m going to be in a rather undignified situation such as this, why compound the humiliation with socks that, first of all, don’t match the smock and, second, show your vulnerability by “needing” someting to keep on? It just adds fuel to the fire of Embarrassment.
Being sockless denotes a secure, fearless, carefree persona…almost pixie-ish, if you will. Heck, I say go in heels and keep them on during the exam. It’s a set-up worthy of a Helmut Newton photo shoot.